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In the Moment, and Out of Your Head


This week’s Trinity Schooling Idea:

“In the Moment, and Out of Your Head”

Horse related sports are, for the most part, enjoyed by women. We, as women, often hold the purse strings and every marketing agency knows that: from Cheerios to Sleep Number beds to car insurance, it’s all the same. We are the target of marketing, and it’s our sympathies that are exploited to make a sale. With the bulk of today’s non-horsey advertising and sales propaganda pointed toward the female population, it’s no surprise that the horse world has followed suit in targeting our weakest link: our self-image.

Hang tags on breeches show lithe models with svelte thighs and midsections sporting the product as they appear “non-chalant,” in the walk with their horse from the barn to the arena. Even though we might laugh at the fact there is no hay in their hair, no green slobber spot on their right shoulder, and their boots don’t even have a crease in them yet. . . the message sticks. It would be nice to look like that in breeches. I have even enjoyed supporting brands that make the products look like they should: Elation breeches has a catalogue that sports pretty normal looking models who, even though they don’t have hay in their hair and are a tidied up version of a rider posing in front of cars and immaculate barns. . . they have curves in places most of us have curves. Thumbs up, Elation.

To make things even more frustrating, dressage riders who spend a lot of time in the saddle probably also spend a lot of time looking into a mirror. Not a mirror on the wall in their house, but the most telling mirror of all: the mirror on the wall of the arena. Every extra lump, every crease, every bounce shows up on that mirror and the moment you are checking out your angle for shoulder-in, you’re catching sight of how you look. . .

I think that as riders we can probably identify in many ways with ballerinas, figure skaters and gymnasts. We spend most of our time measuring ourselves against an ideal. Unlike sports where only the time to the finish line matters, or the team score, or even the amount of weight lifted, we, as dressage riders, are constantly challenged to evaluate how we look in the saddle, above and beyond the performance. And as if riding wasn’t hard enough. . .

There is a point, however, when you have to push the images in your mind aside: stop looking at yourself in the mirror, and only look at the angle of the shoulder-in. If we allow our appearance to become more important than our performance, then the real meat and potatoes of our sport is lost. No amount of bling can cover up missed tempis (trust me). There is not a pair of gloves on the market (that I know of) that can guarantee I will remember to ensure my reins are short enough after my half pass right. And even the most elaborate stock tie and pin, designed to match your browband perfectly, cannot straighten your centerline.

At the end of the day, we can talk about how we wish we had longer legs, or shorter torsos, or smaller thighs but we all have to just suck it up and ride to the best of our ability, every day. No woman that I know of (though perhaps there are a few) likes what she sees in the arena mirror. But the moment you shorten the reins and get to work, accept what you are, and live in the moment, not in your head. Keep the voices quiet by knowing that your horse only cares that you are fair, that you are kind, that you are clear and consistent and that you will try very hard to not get in his way when he gives you the answer to your question. If you can do this, you will keep your eyes focused during your ride on what you’re doing, now what you look like.

Because after the ride, when you dismount and give your horse a hug as you loosen the girth. . . a good shoulder-in is a good shoulder in. Even if you don’t look like the models in the tack store (who I’m sure don’t even know what that is).


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